Well, young man, what can I do for you? he asked, coming directly to the point.
I am looking for a job, I said.
Whats your line?
I beg your pardon?
What can you do?
I am capable of taking charge of this ship as captain, or of working as a man before the mast.
You spread yourself out too thin, my son. A man who can do everything can do nothing. We specialize in our country. I hire men who can do only one thing, and do that thing better than anybody else.
Sir, I do not agree with you, I could not help saying. The most capable people in the world are the Americans. The best log house I ever saw was built by a man who owned a brown-stone front on Fifth Avenue. He simply pushed aside the guides whose specialty it was to do such things, took the axe in his own hands, and showed them how it should be accomplished.
Mr. Hemster shoved his hat to the back of his head, and for the first time during our interview looked me squarely in the face.
Where was that? he inquired.
Up in Canada.
Oh, well, the Fifth Avenue man had probably come from the backwoods and so knew how to handle an axe.
Its more than likely, I admitted.
What were you doing in Canada?
Fishing and shooting.
You werent one of the guides he pushed aside?
I laughed.
No, I was one of the two who paid for the guides.
Well, to come back to first principles, continued Mr. Hemster, Ive got a captain who gives me perfect satisfaction, and he hires the crew. What else can you do?
I am qualified to take a place as engineer if your present man isnt equally efficient with the captain; and I can guarantee to give satisfaction as a stoker, although I dont yearn for the job.
My present engineer I got in Glasgow, said Mr. Hemster; and as for stokers we have a mechanical stoker which answers the purpose reasonably well, although I have several improvements I am going to patent as soon as I get home. I believe the Scotchman I have as engineer is the best in the business. I wouldnt interfere with him for the world.
My heart sank, and I began to fear that Yansan and the sampan-boy would have to wait longer for their money. It seemed that it wasnt my ship that had come in, after all.
Very well, Mr. Hemster, I said, I must congratulate you on being so well suited. I am much obliged to you for receiving me so patiently without a letter of introduction on my part, and so I bid you good-day.
I turned for the ladder, but Mr. Hemster said, with more of animation in his tone than he had hitherto exhibited:
Wait a moment, sonny; dont be so hasty. Youve asked me a good many questions about the yacht and the crew, so I should like to put some to you, and who knows but we may make a deal yet. Theres the galley and the stewards, and that sort of thing, you know. Draw up a chair and sit down.
I did as I was requested. Mr. Hemster threw his cigar overboard and took out another. Then he held out the case toward me, saying:
Do you smoke?
Thank you, said I, selecting a cigar.
Have you matches? he asked, I never carry them myself.
No, I havent, I admitted.
He pushed a button near him, and a Japanese steward appeared.
Bring a box of matches and a bottle of champagne, he said.
The steward set a light wicker table at my elbow, disappeared for a few minutes, and shortly returned with a bottle of champagne and a box of matches. Did my eyes deceive me, or was this the most noted brand in the world, and of the vintage of 78? It seemed too good to be true.
Would you like a sandwich or two with that wine, or is it too soon after lunch?
I could do with a few sandwiches, I confessed, thinking of Yansans frugal fare; and shortly after there were placed before me, on a dainty, white, linen-and-lace-covered plate, some of the most delicious chicken sandwiches that it has ever been my fortune to taste.
Now, said Mr. Hemster, when the steward had disappeared, youre on your uppers, I take it.
I dont think I understand.
Why, youre down at bed-rock. Havent you been in America? Dont you know the language?
Yes is the answer to all your questions.
Whats the reason? Drink? Gambling?
Lord, how good that champagne tasted! I laughed from the pure, dry exhilaration of it.
I wish I could say it was drink that brought me to this pass, I answered; for this champagne shows it would be a tempting road to ruin. I am not a gambler, either. How I came to this pass would not interest you.
Well, I take it thats just an Englishmans way of saying its none of my business; but such is not the fact. You want a job, and you have come to me for it. Very well; I must know something about you. Whether I can give you a job or not will depend. You have said you could captain the ship or run her engines. What makes you so confident of your skill?
The fact is I possessed a yacht of my own not so very long ago, and I captained her and I ran her engines on different occasions.
That might be a recommendation, or it might not. If, as captain, you wrecked your vessel, or if, as engineer, you blew her up, these actions would hardly be a certificate of competency.
I did neither. I sold the yacht in New York for what it would bring.
How much money did you have when you bought your yacht?
I had what you would call half a million.
Why do you say what I would call half a million? What would you call it?
I should call it a hundred thousand.
Ah, I see. Youre talking of pounds, and Im talking of dollars. Youre an Englishman, I suspect. Are you an educated man?
Moderately so. Eton and Oxford, said I, the champagne beginning to have its usual effect on a hungry man. However, the announcement of Eton and Oxford had no effect upon Mr. Hemster, so it did not matter.
Come, young fellow, he said, with some impatience, tell me all about yourself, and dont have to be drawn out like a witness on the stand.
Very well, said I, here is my story. After I left Oxford I had some little influence, as you might call it.
No, a pull, I would call it. All right, where did it land you?
It landed me as secretary to a Minister of the Crown.
You dont mean a preacher?
No, I mean the Minister of Foreign Affairs, and he put me into the diplomatic service when he found the Government was going to be defeated. I was secretary of legation at Pekin and also here in Japan.
I filled myself another glass of champagne, and, holding it up to see the sparkles, continued jauntily:
If I may go so far as to boast, I may say I was entrusted with several delicate missions, and I carried them through with reasonable success. I can both read and write the Japanese language, and I know a smattering of Chinese and a few dialects of the East, which have stood me in good stead more than once. To tell the truth, I was in a fair way for promotion and honor when unfortunately a relative died and left me the hundred thousand pounds that I spoke of.
Why unfortunately? If you had had any brains you could have made that into millions.
Yes, I suppose I could. I thought I was going to do it. I bought myself a yacht at Southampton and sailed for New York. To make a long story short, it was a gold mine and a matter of ten weeks which were taken up with shooting and fishing in Canada. Then I had the gold mine and the experience, while the other fellow had the cash. He was good enough to pay me a trifle for my steam yacht, which, as the advertisements say, was of no further use to the owner.