He put the chisel away in his sporran and took me in his arms, my back to him, so we could both watch them out of sight. He rested his chin on top of my head.
What are ye thinking, Sassenach? he said softly. I saw your eyes; there are clouds in them.
I settled against him, feeling his warmth a bulwark at my back.
The children, I said, hesitant. TheyI mean, its wonderful that theyre here. To think wed never see them again, and suddenly I swallowed, overcome by the dizzying joy of finding myselffinding usonce again and so unexpectedly part of that remarkable thing, a family. To be able to see Jem and Mandy grow up to have Bree and Roger again
Aye, he said, a smile in his voice. But?
It took a moment, both to gather my thoughts and to put them into words.
Roger said that something bad had happened, in their own time. And you know it must have been something truly terrible.
Aye, he said, his voice hardening a little. Brianna said the same. But ken, a nighean, theyve lived in this time before. They do know, I meanwhat its like, what it will be like.
The ongoing war, he meant, and I squeezed his hands, clasped about my middle.
I dont think they do, I said softly, looking down across the broad cove. They had vanished into the darkness. Nobody knows who hasnt been there. To war.
Aye, he said, and held me, silent, his hand resting on my side, over the scar of the wound made by a musket ball at Monmouth.
Aye, he said again after a long moment. I ken what yere saying, Sassenach. I thought my heart would burst when I saw Brianna and kent it was really her, and the bairns but for all the joy of it see, I missed them cruelly, but I could take comfort in thinking they were safe. Now
He stopped and I felt his heart beating against me, slow and steady. He took a deep breath, and the fire popped suddenly, a pocket of pitch exploding in sparks that disappeared into the night. A small reminder of the war that was rising, slowly, all around us.
I look at them, he said, and my heart is suddenly filled with
Terror, I whispered, holding tight to him. Sheer terror.
Aye, he said. That.
WE STOOD FOR a bit, watching the darkness below, letting joy return. The window of the Higgins cabin still glowed softly on the far side of the clearing below.
Nine people in that cabin, I said. I took a deep breath of the cool, spruce-scented night, envisioning the fug and humid warmth of nine sleeping bodies, occupying every horizontal inch of the place, with a cauldron and kettle steaming on the hearth.
The second window bloomed into brightness.
Four of them ours, Jamie said, and laughed softly.
I hope the place doesnt burn down. Someone had put fresh wood on the fire, and sparks were beginning to dance above the chimney.
It willna burn down. He turned me round to face him. I want ye, a nighean, he said softly. Will ye lie wi me? It may be the last time we have any privacy for some while.
I opened my mouth to say, Of course! and instead yawned hugely.
I clapped a hand to my mouth, removing it to say, Oh, dear. I really didnt mean that.
He was laughing, almost soundlessly. Shaking his head, he straightened out the rumpled quilt Id been sitting on, knelt on it, and stretched up a hand to me.
Come lie wi me and watch the stars for a bit, Sassenach. If yere still awake in five minutes, Ill take your clothes off and have ye naked in the moonlight.
And if Im asleep in five minutes? I kicked off my shoes and took his hand.
Then I wont bother takin your clothes off.
The fire was burning lower but still steadily; I could feel the warm breeze of it touch my face and lift the hair at my temples. The stars were thick and bright as diamonds spilled in some celestial burglary. I shared this observation with Jamie, who made a very derogatory Scottish noise in response, but then lay back beside me, sighing in pleasure at the view.
Aye, theyre bonnie. Ken Cassiopeia there?
I looked at the approximate portion of the sky indicated by his nod, but shook my head. Im complete rubbish at constellations. I can see the Big Dipper, and I usually recognize Orions Belt, but damned if I see it at the moment. And the Pleiades are up there somewhere, arent they?
Theyre part of Taurusjust there by the hunter. He stretched out an arm, pointing. And thats Camelopardalis.
Oh, dont be silly. There isnt a giraffe constellation, I would have heard of that.
Well, its no really in the sky just now, but there is one. And come to think, is it any more ridiculous than whats happened today?
No, I said softly. No, its not. He put an arm around me and I rolled over to lay my cheek on his chest, and we watched the stars in silence, listening to the wind in the trees and the slow beat of our hearts.
It seemed a long time later when Jamie stirred and sighed.
I dinna think Ive ever seen such stars, not since the night we made Faith.
I lifted my head in surprise. We seldom mentioned Faithstillborn, but embedded in our heartsto each other, though each of us knew the others feelings.
You know when she was conceived? I dont know that.
He ran his hand slowly down my back, fingers pausing to rub circles in the small of it. If Id been a cat, I would have waved my tail gently under his nose.