Oh, thank you, I cried; you dont know what you have done for me now!
I am glad! I am glad! But tell me how did you nd out that I was the sort of woman with whom well, whom you think worthy of attention and friendship in fact, not a landlady as you say? What made you decide to come up to me?
What made me? But you were alone; that gentleman was too insolent; its night. You must admit that it was a duty
No, no; I mean before, on the other side, you know you meant to come up to me.
On the other side? Really I dont know how to answer; I am afraid to Do you know I have been happy to-day? I walked along singing; I went out into the country; I have never had such happy moments. You perhaps it was my fancy Forgive me for referring to it; I fancied you were crying, and I could not bear to hear it it made my heart ache . Oh, my goodness! Surely I might be troubled about you! Surely there was no harm in feeling brotherly compassion for you I beg your pardon, I said compassion Well, in short, surely you would not be oended at my involuntary impulse to go up to you?
Stop, thats enough, dont talk of it, said the girl, looking down, and pressing my hand. Its my fault for having spoken of it; but I am glad I was not mistaken in you But here I am home; I must go down this turning, its two steps from here Good-bye, thank you!
Surely surely you dont mean that we shall never see each other again? Surely this is not to be the end?
You see, said the girl, laughing, at rst you only wanted two words, and now However, I wont say anything perhaps we shall meet
I shall come here to-morrow, I said. Oh, forgive me, I am already making demands
Yes, you are not very patient you are almost insisting.
Listen, listen! I interrupted her. Forgive me if I tell you something else I tell you what, I cant help coming here to-morrow, I am a dreamer; I have so little real life that I look upon such moments as this now, as so rare, that I cannot help going over such moments again in my dreams. I shall be dreaming of you all night, a whole week, a whole year. I shall certainly come here to-morrow, just here to this place, just at the same hour, and I shall be happy remembering today. This place is dear to me already. I have already two or three such places in Petersburg. I once shed tears over memories like you Who knows, perhaps you were weeping ten minutes ago over some memory But, forgive me, I have forgotten myself again; perhaps you have once been particularly happy here
Very good, said the girl, perhaps I will come here to-morrow, too, at ten oclock. I see that I cant forbid you The fact is, I have to be here; dont imagine that I am making an appointment with you; I tell you beforehand that I have to be here on my own account. But well, I tell you straight out, I dont mind if you do come. To begin with, something unpleasant might happen as it did to-day, but never mind that In short, I should simply like to see you to say two words to you. Only, mind, you must not think the worse of me now! Dont think I make appointments so lightly I shouldnt make it except that But let that be my secret! Only a compact beforehand
A compact! Speak, tell me, tell me all beforehand; I agree to anything, I am ready for anything, I cried delighted. I answer for myself, I will be obedient, respectful you know me
Its just because I do know you that I ask you to come to-morrow, said the girl, laughing. I know you perfectly. But mind you will come on the condition, in the rst place (only be good, do what I ask you see, I speak frankly), you wont fall in love with me Thats impossible, I assure you. I am ready for friendship; heres my hand But you mustnt fall in love with me, I beg you!
I swear, I cried, gripping her hand
Hush, dont swear, I know you are ready to are up like gunpowder. Dont think ill of me for saying so. If only you knew I, too, have no one to whom I can say a word, whose advice I can ask. Of course, one does not look for an adviser in the street; but you are an exception. I know you as though we had been friends for twenty years You wont deceive me, will you?
You will see the only thing is, I dont know how I am going to survive the next twenty-four hours.
Sleep soundly. Good-night, and remember that I have trusted you already. But you exclaimed so nicely just now, Surely one cant be held responsible for every feeling, even for brotherly sympathy! Do you know, that was so nicely said, that the idea struck me at once, that I might conde in you?
For Gods sake do; but about what? What is it?
Wait till to-morrow. Meanwhile, let that be a secret. So much the better for you; it will give it a faint avour of romance. Perhaps I will tell you to-morrow, and perhaps not I will talk to you a little more beforehand; we will get to know each other better
Oh yes, I will tell you all about myself tomorrow! But what has happened? It is as though a miracle had befallen me My God, where am I? Come, tell me arent you glad that you were not angry and did not drive me away at the rst moment, as any other woman would have done? In two minutes you have made me happy for ever. Yes, happy; who knows, perhaps, you have reconciled me with myself, solved my doubts! Perhaps such moments come upon me But there I will tell you all about it to-morrow, you shall know everything, everything